Clumsy
by the next best thing
Summary: Mysterious. Rich. Manipulative. And completely arrogant. Pemberley welcomes it's newest member, Mr Darcy. He has already sent the female population head over heals save one. Elizabeth Bennet has sworn to never fall for his charms. Is she in for a ride!


Feet pounding on the pavement floor below, drawing in another deep breathe as she turns the corner. The slight breeze flicks her hair in her face but she does not notice. The ache in her side grows worse with every step until finally the pain is too much to bear as she comes to a stop.

Resting her arms on the wall beside her, she leans over to ease the stitch and catch her breath. Straightening, she looks up at the ocean view in front of her. While impatiently pushing stray hair behind her ears, she notices two men walking along the sand, occasionally pointing to the large house on the far east side of the beach.

Close to being a mansion, many people have had an interest in it. However, the price of the building is extremely expensive so the estate has been left unoccupied for many years.

Looking back at the retreating figures, she suspected that they were probably just passing through the neighbourhood and wanted to take a quick look before leaving again. Thinking nothing more of it, she turned back and ran home.

XOXOXOXOX

"I'm home!" Lizzy called out, closing the front door behind her. She quickly walked into the kitchen and gulped down two glasses of water. Her stomach grumbled so she went to the fridge and peered inside. Lizzy was always hungry after a jog. Taking a choc-chip muffin she wondered into the living room to find three of her sisters and her mom.

"Hey do we have any of that banana cake left?" she asked, dropping onto the couch next to her little sister Lydia.

"Elizabeth! I'm on the phone. Do you think I could have a little peace and quiet?" her mother snapped.

Lizzy held up her hands in defence and bit into her muffin. Lydia peered over and wrinkled her nose in disgust. "I can't understand why you run so much, Lizzy. If you desperately want to lose weight them I know some good diets you can go on." she said.

"Surprisingly enough Lydia, my running isn't an attempt to lose weight. There is this new thing going around called exercise. You should try it sometimes rather than refusing to eat carbs for a month."

To this Lydia let out a Oh-My-God-how-could-you-say-such-a-thing cough and tried to defend her cause. "I do plenty of exercise but I'm sure you wouldn't notice."

Lizzy had to roll her eyes at this sentence and promptly ask, "Name one thing that you've done this week?"

It took several minutes of silent thought and a pathetic attempt to change the subject to prove Lizzy right. She promptly chuckled to herself and left to take a shower.

After washing, Elizabeth went to her room to get changed. She checked to make sure her older sister, Jane, wasn't already in there before stripping off her towel and moving towards her tiny closet, pulling out one of the few trackies that she had left. Her father wasn't very rich. Not many people have five children to look after.

Mr Bennet worked as a history teacher, so it is fair to say he didn't make a whole lot of money. He inherited the estate from his father who died 24 years ago. He wanted to just sell the thing but upon visiting Hertfordshire, he laid his eyes on a beautiful nineteen-year-old, whom which he married soon after. A mistake he's been regretting since the wedding vows.

XOXOXOXOX

Mary, Jane and Lizzy sat crowded round a small table, papers strewn everywhere. Both Jane and Elizabeth were working on a particularly difficult economics assessment, trying to finish it before holidays end. Mary, however, had long since finished any schoolwork and was studying for HSC. She was in Year 10.

In the early hours of day, all five sisters were found studying but the youngest gave up hours ago, in search for something a touch more thrilling. Boys were a given.

Lydia and Kitty are twins. Even though Kitty technically came first, Lydia is the more domineering of the two. Kitty is just happy to follow and mimic everything her twin does. With mothers influence they are boy crazy, work allergic, fashion obsessed and complete airheads. Mary had, thankfully, a little more sense. However too much sense has turned her into the nerd of the family.

Fortunately Lizzy was pushed one year forward a grade by her parents. Not due any sign of geniusness but for the sole purpose to protect her goddess of a sister. Maybe it's the fact that Jane is the first child or maybe because she looks like a friggin angel and doesn't have the verbal capacity to tell all the sleazy guys who ask her out to shove it where the sun don't shine. Therefore Lizzy takes on the dire task of protecting her from all the hormone infested boys at Rookweld High.

Despite the constant trauma of the male students courting her sister, Lizzy was pretty lucky. Jane was her closest relative, apart from her father, so classes became a blast with her by her side. Plus there was the added benefit of Lizzy stealing the homework answers.

Looking up, Jane leaned over to her sister and pointed something out on the assessment criteria. "Does that mean that not only does the essay have to be devoid of any personal or exclusive opinion but also equally appreciate all parties involved in the financial status of common society's healthcare."

Crinkling her upper forehead, Lizzy strained to understand what the heck her sister meant. Re-reading the list of requirements, her eyebrows rose in shock. "But the financial situation of English healthcare includes dozens of corporations. The British Pharmaceutical Board, Medicare International, Pensioner's Clause, Drug Manufacturers and practically every political party that has ever passed a bill in reference to medicine and public health!"

Realisation sinking in Lizzy smacked her head eloquently on the table and groaned. "Mr Draken is evil! How are we going to get this darned thing finished in time?"

This is promptly when Mary decided to butt in, "I believe you wouldn't have this problem if you started your assessment at the beginning of break." Lizzy, still angry gave her sister a sharp kick under the table whist Jane just sighed in utter defeat.

After another hour of mind-numbing research, Lizzy could barely concentrate. Finally calling it quits she looked at the time, amazed to see that it was already five thirty. "Shit guys we have to get ready!" she yelled, piling the books laid out on the table.

"Why?" Mary mumbled, still buried in a textbook.

"Dad has that dinner with the new principal. We have to be there at six!"

Systematically both sisters looked up at the clock and stood up in shock. Lizzy would've laughed at their reactions if she weren't busy stuffing all the books into her bag. "Don't worry, I've got this. You two get changed."

Five minutes later Lizzy took the role of reminding her twin sisters to ready themselves as well and spent the next ten minutes pounding on the bathroom door for Jane to hurry up.

Hair still wet, she pulled it into a messy ponytail and threw on jeans and a Matchbook Romance band t-shirt. Compared to her sister, they barely looked related. Jane wearing a stunning pink frilly top and simple black pants. Her blonde hair was delicately curled to frame her face. Adding heels, earrings and lipstick, she was ready to make a good impression.

Lizzy stood in front of the wardrobe mirror pleased with her effort, her sister a little less so. "Honey are you sure you don't want to borrow any clothes from me. Your wardrobe may not have any clothes that… suit the occasion."

"You're the one to talk. Those are my pants."

Immediately dropping the subject she spun around in confusion before finally coming to a halt when she spotted her white jacket lying haphazardly across the back of a chair. Putting it on they left the room to find the rest of their family waiting beside the door.

Her mother smiled in approval when she saw her eldest daughter. Moving her attention onto Elizabeth. "What do you think you are doing? This dinner is very important to your father and you are dressed like you were going to the park. Change!"

Her father could see no wrong in his daughter's clothes and saved her from obeying his wife. "Darling we do not have enough time, we're late as it is." he said soothingly.

Giving one exasperated huff she shushed her daughters into the family car. Walking next to Lizzy he gave her a reassuring wink, raising her spirits to pre-mother-lecture state.

XOXOXOXOX

Darcy lay on his bed, iPod conveniently shoved in his ears to drown out all sound. Slumped against the pillow he tried to distract himself from going downstairs where there will be one of his father's new employees and their family joining them for dinner. Darcy rolled his eyes. Why did they have to leave New York and come to this boring place? He had only been in Pemberley for four days and already he hated it.

Thank god Bingley had come with him but even his friend's enthusiasm for the place started to piss him off. _"Look how close these people are. This is what you can't get in New York. Walk down the street and people stop and say hello." _Ding ding ding. Congratulations you have just won $2000 and a lifetime supply of marshmallows. That is exactly what Darcy loathed about the town. Hating confrontations, you could easily get around that in America. Nobody noticed, nobody cared.

torn, i'm filthy  
born in my own misery  
stole all that you gave me  
control you claim you save me  
the peace is dead in my soul  
i have blamed the reason for  
my intentions poor  
yes i'm the one who  
the only one who  
would carry on this far

The door to Darcy's room opened and he took a quick look at who it was before closing his eyes again. Sauntering over, she sat on his bed and waited for him to notice her. After a few moments she realised he wasn't going to so took out his earphones and put it in her ear.

"Ergh! How can you like any of this death-metal crap?" she asked in a disgusted voice.

Getting up off the bed, Darcy unplugged the earphones and threw them away. Going across the room he took out a new packet of earphones and put them back into the iPod. "Creed is hardly metal."

"Whatever." she replied, already bored with this conversation. "Hurry up. The guests are here."

Watching her walk out of the room, Darcy was reminded of the one bad thing about his friend coming to England with him. He brought his sister.

Silently walking down into the foyer he heard a burst of giggles and knew he would already hate this dinner. Next to the door stood the Bennett family, a group consisting of the one father and six girls. From where he was standing, nobody had noticed his presence so he was able to survey the guests without them doing the exact same thing.

The father, wearing an old suit, practically had his annual income tattooed on his forehead. Although having a kind face, he stood out amongst the house's plush interior. Latched onto his arm was a woman slightly younger than him yet dressed as if a teenager. He could almost hear the thud her jaw made when it hit the ground as she looked around the room in awe.

The two youngest daughters looked identical. Dressed in the same bright clothing, frilly tops and short skirts, giggling uncontrollably. The girl next to them was the ultimate nerd stereotype. Even the slogan on her t-shirt, 'Death! Our nation's number one killer.', gave her away. At least, he thought, they have something in common. Both looked like they'd rather be anywhere else but here.

The two other daughters looked around the same age but, as far as appearances go, were completely different. The brunette was enthusiastically participating in conversation with his father and Bingley. Occasionally making jokes. Dressed casually he was impressed when he spotted the band name. Darcy's eyes unconsciously lingered on her for longer than they did the others, watching as she tilted her head slightly and grinned. Her sister was more elegantly dressed, however shyly standing behind. Her beauty couldn't be denied but Darcy wasn't interested. Beautiful but timid, not his type.

His father, who had been maintaining polite conversation with the family looked around and finally spotted him. Coming out of the shadows, all attention was drawn to him as he walked over to the crowd.

"This is my son, Darcy." his father announced, "He will be attending his final year in Rookweld."

"Ah, Jane and Elizabeth, will be in the same grades as you then." Mr Bennett said, pointing out the two eldest girls. Darcy's attention was once again drawn to them. The blonde smiled politely whilst Elizabeth gazed at him, confused. "Your first name is your last name?" she asked.

"No." he said simply. They both looked into each other's eyes, analysing them. What felt like ages, she finally broke contact. That was it, their connection was lost. Though she turned away, he persisted in staring at her and it soon became obvious that she was well aware of it.

"Let's move into the dining room, shall we?" Mr Darcy declared and the whole party soon shifted into the next room.

The three families were scattered randomly around the table. The two fathers sitting at one end began chatting happily about the school, the economy, the government, the wine, British/American culture and third world countries currently experiencing constitutional anarchy, not necessarily in that order. Lizzy and the younger Darcy were seated directly opposite with Bingley sitting conveniently next to him. Therefore to engage conversation with him, she would have to look in his direction. The alternative was to talk about Reese Witherspoon's breakup with her sisters.

What made her situation even worse was that, although difficult her task was to talk to Bingley, it was not her he was interested in. Seated to his left was Jane. Smiling in satisfaction as she watched the two engage in an easy conversation. From the brief conversation she had with Bingley in the foyer, she approved of his gentle disposition, alarmingly like her elder sister's.

Moving her eyes to the left, they once again met with his cold grey ones. Quickly looking down at her food, her usual hearty appetite had gone out the window. "Don't you think it's a little presumptuous to wear a Matchbook Romance t-shirt when you have never seen them perform?"

Lizzy looked up from her untouched plate and put down the fork that was hovering over it, still immaculate and shiny. _So the guy has a voice._ Lizzy smiled despite herself, any conversation would suffice yet happy to be involved in an argument. "I'm surprised you know Matchbook Romance. I didn't think it'd be in your vocabulary giving your stellar contribution to tonight's conversation. How would you know if I've seen them or not?"

Darcy was taken aback by her subtle attack, the image of the cute laughing girl in the foyer was diminished. "I've been following the bands tour list and they have never been to Britain." He admitted, seeing her smug face he thought he would take her approach and hit her where it hurts. "I thought the culture here would be different from America but I guess anywhere you go you'll find the same teenagers who would fake the knowledge and respect of a band to try and fit in or, worse, stand out."

"You seem to know so much about me despite the fact we only just met. Image must be the main source of fuel for prejudice seeing you have me all worked out based on a logo. In New York, personality and background must not come into account when judging a person's character. Pity really. All that up to date research on Matchbook Romance's tour yet you seem to have forgotten their recent visit to Paris. A £52 ticket and an overnight train under the English Channel would get you there easily. I suppose in any country you'll find the same teenagers who will make any old accusation to feel superior. So hey Mr Ego, I think we need a deflation."

Lizzy smiled coyly and looked amongst the others, now only realising that all the heads were turned in her direction and hanging on every word. Taking a deep breath she needed to get out of the awkwardness. "Excuse me Mr Darcy but may I ask where the restroom is?" she asked.

"Along the corridor and the last door on your right." he said, his face surprisingly bland compared to the wide eyes around the table.

Removing herself from the table and more importantly, the tension, she went in search of an escape. Before turning into the located bathroom, Lizzy noticed an open balcony that led to the beach. Finding fresh was better than a secluded cubicle, she snuck out of the house.

XOXOXOXOX

Despite winning the argument with Darcy, Lizzy was still angry. Taking several gulps of fresh air, she looked out onto the dark beach. Resting my arms on the ledge I watched the waves tumbling over each other. It calmed me a little but still my fingers twitched in rage.

Pacing along the small balcony, Lizzy curled her hands into a fist, remembering every word of their conversation. "God how can he be such a bastard?" she screamed, slumping against the railing. She needed to get out. Suddenly an idea popped into her head that successfully calmed her irritation. Quietly climbing over the ledge, Elizabeth observed the wall below her. Making a zigzag through all the potholes and window frames, she jumped down onto the sand. Carelessly pulling off her shoes, she placed them next to the house and began her slow jog along the beach.

The short run managed to do her good as she completely forgot about Darcy. The feeling, however, was not the same for the other person. After Elizabeth left the table, the people remained quiet, all except the Bennett twins who were giggling furiously. Darcy, who could not stand all the eyes on him, excused himself. The moment he was removed from view, the dining room erupted in conversation about the fight. He fought to roll his eyes.

Walking down the same corridor, Darcy looked for the Bennett girl. Stopping halfway, he realised he had not thought his plan through enough. How could he go into the girl's bathroom? About to turn back, the open balcony door stopped him. He made his way outside but saw no one there. Leaning his hands on the ledge, he looked out at the depressing ocean view, which in about six seconds was going to get more interesting.

Panting heavily, Lizzy stopped to rest, collapsing on the sand. The night stars added calm to her demeanour. Thirty-one. Her pounding heart had pumped warm blood around her body, but now that she had rested, the cold sunk in. Lizzy stood up and ran back towards the house still unaware that someone was watching her every move.

"Shit shit shit." She repeated as she pulled on her shoes. It had been at least twenty minutes since she had left the table and her parents were probably looking for her. Not really paying attention, she climbed up the brick wall. Close to the top she lost her footing and was about to make the painful fall down but an arm reached out and grabbed her at the last moment.

Safely back over the ledge she looked up to thank her rescuer but stopped at the sight of him. "Did you have a nice run?" Darcy asked coyly.

"What are you doing here?" she bit back, ignoring his question.

"It's my house."

"Ah but is it your beach?" she rebuked and pushed her way past him into the house. _Great! Just when I stopped thinking about him._

Striding back into the dining room, the room was empty except for a few maids clearing the dishes, hers untouched. Lizzy started to panic as it was such a big house and she didn't want to end up frantically running around trying to look for her family.

"Seems like you lost your folks." came a voice from the door.

Sighing loudly she tried to get past him but since he was standing directly in front of her escape route, it was proven to be difficult. "Move!"

"This is my house! I can do what I want."

"So you keep reminding me" she said while dodging through the small space between him and the door. Bruising her shoulder against the wall, Lizzy was not in a good mood as she took off down the corridor. Unfortunately for her, he followed.

"Well I want the message to get through to the dim-witted." he continued, purposely trying to vex her.

"Is that why you keep saying it out loud so you won't forget? Poor little rich kid, moving from one big house to another must be confusing." He was silenced.

Nearing the front of the house, Lizzy heard pitched squeals and knew she was heading in the right direction. Outside, the entire group was gathered around a blue Porsche. Kitty and Lydia were stroking the vehicle in awe while the two men talked about engines and insurance and blah. Like Caroline, Mary was standing aside looking very bored. And much to Lizzy's delight it looked like Jane and Bingley were in their own world, walking around the garden.

"Finally graced with your presence Miss Bennett." The stern man said, turning his attention away from her father, mid-sentence.

"I'm sorry Mr Darcy. I just needed to get some air." Lizzy apologised, hoping he would drop the subject. From the look on his face, she should have known better.

"With my son?" he asked, his eyes scanning between the two of them, who unnoticeably were standing quite close. Finally realising, this Lizzy stepped slightly away, still trying to find an excuse for them both missing dinner. Gnawing her bottom lip, her mind went blank for a plausible defence. Enjoying the starry night? _Hardly! _Period pain? _Too much detail_. Leg fell off_. Nope still there_. Attacked by pirates looking to feed Keira Knightley. _Hmm…_

"Sorry father. I followed her outside and we managed to resolve our little dispute earlier. I apologise for missing dinner." Darcy cut in, fake sincerity plastered on his face.

Satisfied with the half-assed attempt at truth, the older Darcy returned to farewell the guests. Meanwhile Darcy turned to leave but stopped to see Elizabeth, jaw dropped, staring at him in awe. "Amazing! You just said an entire sentence that wasn't dripping with distain." She breathed, a sadistic grin forming. "Do that again!"

Unamused, he tried to suppress his next outrage at her sarcasm when he just protected her secret jog. "Nice to meet you Bennett."

"Same here Darcy."

XOXOXOXOX

The modern Pride & Prejudice. I think I'll be changing the name as I progress but right now I like the thought of clumsy in love. If you know the story then you'll know that the two protagonists make so many mistakes, so much that you want to shake them and say 'Get it together! You like him. He likes you. So flippin kiss already.'

But then it would be a really short story.

If you like this so far, please don't get your hopes up. I've had a really busy 2007 and a probably even busier 2008. If you don't believe me, ask the people who have been waiting for the next chapter in NSEA. (I swear I'm like two pages away guys) But reviews always help. If I get at least ten, you can expect another chapter soon.

Thanks guys… or girls most probably. I don't have much experience in what the male sex reads but I do know that my dad always leaves the room whenever we have the BBC version of P&P running. Well if there are any male reviewers out there, I'd love to know your opinion of this seemingly wholesome girly novel.

Ta all


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